THINGY (thing-ee) n.
female:    Any part under a car's bonnet.
male:      The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

LESBIAN (lez-bi-an) n.
female:    A woman who makes love to other women.
male:      A woman who has sex with other women so men can watch.

VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
female:    Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
male:      Playing cricket without a box.

REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
female:    A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
male:      A device for scanning through all 75 channels every 2 minutes.

COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
female:    The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
male:      Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend
with your mates.

BUM (bum) n.
female:    The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes
look bigger.
male:      The organ for mooning (and farting).

COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
female:    A desire to get married and raise a family.
male:      Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's
girlfriend.

ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
female:    A good movie, concert, play or book, dinner with best mates.
male:      Sex, preferably with two lesbians.

FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
female:    An embarrassing by-product of digestion.
male:      An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and male
bonding.

MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
female:    The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
male:      What women do while the man is shagging.